Instead of an hourglass icon youвЂ™d get an empty beer bottle.

Tagged toilet paper If Microsoft Was Located In GeorgiaвЂ¦ In a bold marketing move, Microsoft and Kimberly-Clark agreed to co-market the вЂњHTTP://вЂќ Tissue with the slogan, вЂњWhen Do You Want to Go Today?вЂќ The web page images are provided by a number of sponsors, most notably Microsoft Corporation, the lead sponsor with over 256 sheets displaying different screen shots from the companyвЂ™s various web sites. вЂњIf our test markets are any indicator, the 1K rolls should be a big hit with not only the geeks on the go, but also geeks whoвЂ™ve got to go!вЂќД®ach sheet of the 1K-sheet rolls of вЂњHTTP://вЂќ Tissue will feature a different image from a popular web page. The new вЂњHTTP://вЂќ (pronounced вЂњH,T,T,P Colon Slash SlashвЂќ) tissue will be available in one kilosheet (1024 sheet) rolls instead of the traditional 1000-sheet rolls. Introduced in 1913, Scott Tissue is soft, strong and long lasting with 1,000-sheetrolls.

Scott Tissue is the worldвЂ™s oldest and best-selling bathroom tissue, available in more countries than any other brand of tissue. Kimberly-Clark, makers of the popular Scott brand of bathroom tissue, today announced its new вЂњHTTP://вЂќ brand of bathroom tissue targeted directly to the 90вЂ™s вЂњdigeratiвЂќ market. Posted in Microsoft/Bill Gates, The Business World |Д®AST FILABUCKET, NY (DenounceNewswire - October 30, 1997). If you do have a computer and e-mail, you have already been taken to the cleaners by Microsoft.Seeing that you got this story via e-mail, youвЂ™re probably closer to becoming a janitor than you are to becoming a millionaire.If you donвЂ™t have e-mail, but work hard, you can still become a millionaire.The Internet, e-mail and e-commerce do not need to rule your life.When the man replies that he has no e-mail, the adviser is stunned, вЂњWhat, you donвЂ™t have e-mail? How on earth have you managed to amass such wealth without the Internet, e-mail and e-commerce? Just imagine where you would be now, if you had been connected to the Internet from the very start!вЂќДЄfter a moment of thought, the tomato millionaire replied, вЂњWhy, of course! I would be a floor cleaner at Microsoft!вЂќ At the end of the telephone conversation, the adviser asks him for his e-mail address in order to send the final documents electronically. Consulting with an insurance adviser, he picks an insurance plan to fit his new circumstances. Planning for the future of his wife and children, he decides to buy some life insurance. After a short time he acquires a cart to transport several dozen boxes of tomatoes, only to have to trade it in again so that he can buy a pick-up truck to support his expanding business.Д«y the end of the second year, he is the owner of a fleet of pick-up trucks and manages a staff of a hundred former unemployed people, all selling tomatoes. Getting up early every day and going to bed late, he multiplies his profits quickly. Repeating the process several times more that day, he ends up with almost $100 before going to sleep that night.ДЄnd thus it dawns on him that he could quite easily make a living selling tomatoes. Within less than 2 hours, he sells all the tomatoes individually at 100% profit. Not knowing where to turn and having only $10 in his wallet, he decides to buy a 25 lb. To this the MS manager replies, вЂњWell, then, that means that you virtually donвЂ™t exist and can therefore hardly expect to be employed.вЂќ Taken aback, the man protests that he has neither a computer nor an e-mail address. Let me have your e-mail address, so that I can send you a form to complete and tell you where to report for work on your first day.вЂќ

The manager there arranges for him to take an aptitude test (Section: Floors, sweeping and cleaning).ДЄfter the test, the manager says, вЂњYou will be employed at minimum wage, $5.15 an hour.

An unemployed man goes to apply for a job with Microsoft as a janitor.

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